i usually love cheap products that valorize vain, power-hungry podcasters and contribute to their passive income stream and rapidly declining culture relevance.

but this one sucks. and i come from generational wealth. so i’m not even salty.

it’s just bad

Wanna pay through the nose, or puke through the nose? Nah, man, what do u take me for?? Didn't even get nice drunk, was just so angry at EVERYTHING after drinking several bottles with a homeless friend of mine. Poor show guys.

Words can’t describe how over priced this is. Bottom shelf, under 40% strength, discount vodka that’s been left in the sun for 3 years would taste better.

Two millionaire hack comedians siphoning money from their idiot fans.

I have never tasted such a confusing vodka in my life, and I regularly drink swill that is unfit for industrial-grade chemical processing, let alone human consumption.

The bottle exudes quality that is in no way reflected in the product it contains. The aroma, texture and flavor profile is heavily reminiscent of high-proof isopropyl alcohol which has been used to extensively sanitize machinery, then strained and recycled for multiple uses before being stored in a steel barrel until it was repurposed as a spirit.

I would recommend this product to anyone that feels they would enjoy the sensation of experiencing a catastrophic top fuel funny car accident in their mouth and throughout the length of their digestive tract. A shot of Por Osos vodka is something the body instinctively and vehemently rejects upon contact with the mucous membrane.

It is painful. Swallowing it requires a near zen-like detachment from the intense physical revulsion. The fumes are harsh and corrosive in the mouth, and you will be wrestling with your gag reflex the entire time. The indigestion is instantaneous. The weird chemical flavor lingers and burns the sinuses after every breath. Drinking multiple shots is a commitment to discomfort and one must be prepared to repeatedly shock the senses on purpose.

I am not surprised that Bert can drink it with a straight face; if the cards of fate had been dealt differently, he may have been Shoenice22. I am certain that he could swallow a live porcupine if he thought it would take his fame to the next level. What shocks me is that Tom Segura has anything to do with this. Unless he's just dedicated to the bit (read as: scam) there's absolutely no reason for Tom or anyone who isn't orbiting rock bottom to be drinking liquor of this staggeringly abysmal quality.

I somewhat suspect that when Bert and Tom and Adam Ray and whoever else they have roped into this liquor-shilling operation are depicted drinking Por Osos, they are drinking a significantly higher-quality or perhaps just a completely different, more expensive vodka in a Por Osos bottle. It is aggressively terrible booze to drink for the sake of a grift.

All that being said, if you are looking to get drunk, and you want to be comprehensively aware of the fact that what you are putting into your body is incontrovertibly poison down to the last molecule, Por Osos vodka is the vodka for you.

I would probably buy and drink this vodka regularly if they reduced the price by roughly 75%, which I heavily advise that they do. Seasoned, perennial alcoholics are advised to steer clear and continue slamming the remnants of other people's abandoned drinks at the bar and the casino, supplemented with whatever can be found dripping out of exposed hoses on air conditioning units throughout their town or city of residence.

Or, you can just buy literally any other vodka on the shelf anywhere that sells alcohol and just live with the fact that it doesn't force you to acknowledge you're in the express lane to Hell with every sip.

At its current price point, the only real reasons to purchase a bottle of Por Osos are as follows: ironically, or as a joke, preferably to give to someone you don't particularly like; morbid curiosity (spoiler: you will not enjoy this vodka); or you just feel like taking a very roundabout path to giving Bert Kreischer or Tom Segura a few dollars.

Probably don't do that last one. Do not encourage this clownery.

Bert, if you're reading this, it's never too late to go back to the Travel Channel. Tom, if you're reading this... bring back Fat Tom.

Overpriced youtuber vodka. The quality is garbage. The price is 79x higher than it should be! I feel ripped off.